Would you believe me if I told you that a person filed a lawsuit against God? I bet all atheists would die to get a seat in that courtroom!
Some people have too much time on their hands. Or maybe they are so intelligent that their thinking is on another level? Like the man who sued himself because he was disappointed with his own behaviour? Well, well, we have quite a few specimens here:
1. Teenagers sue railroad company after being injured… when they trespassed on it
Lawsuit Amount: $24.2 million
When two teenagers trespassed onto railroad property and climbed on top of a rail car, they received serious burn injuries because of a 12,500-volt electrical wire. Jeffrey Klein was burned over 75 percent of his body, and Brett Birdwell, over 18 percent of his body.
Well, instead of staying off someone else’s property, these teenagers climbed on top of the railroad car so that they could see the view from the top.
They filed a lawsuit against the company that owned the locomotive for not having posted warning signs of the danger from the electrified wires that power the locomotives. The teens received a combined $24.2 million for the medical costs they incurred, pain and suffering, and “loss of life pleasures”.
2. Student sues teacher after his eardrum bursts when she wakes him up in class
A 16 year old Connecticut high school student was sleeping in class while his teacher was teaching. His teacher woke him up by smacking her palm down on his desk.
The result? He not only woke up, but apparently also suffered substantial hearing loss. His father claimed that the teacher slammed down her hand so hard that his son’s eardrum burst, and he experienced an almost complete loss of hearing.
Predictably, the case drew its share of ridicule, and the boy was also teased in school.
See there’s a reason why you are not supposed to sleep in school!
3. Homeowners Association sues woman for painting her grandchild’s playhouse pink
A grandmother built a playhouse for her granddaughter in their backyard, and painted it pink. *gasp* Pink?! How could you?!! This was apparently the reaction of the homeowners association of her Mill Haven neighborhood in Georgia, because they filed a lawsuit against her… because the playhouse was pink?
The homeowners association stated that it had no problem with the playhouse being built, but wants the color of it changed after complaints by neighbors, and that Becky Rogers-Peck (the grandmother ) should have taken their permission before painting it pink.
On the other hand, Rogers-Peck believed that the playhouse does not fall under the definition of a backyard structure like a shed or a garage, and could not be subject to the association’s rules, so she can paint it any color she wants. Also, the playhouse couldn’t be seen from the street, and pink was her granddaughter’s favourite colour.
4. Man sues wife after she admits she has had plastic surgery
When the couple’s first baby was born, the father – Jian Feng- was shocked that his apparently beautiful wife gave birth to a baby that was “incredibly ugly, to the point where it horrified me.” The baby looked so different from the parents that Jian Feng accused his wife of cheating on him.
But no, the case was not to be that simple. Because… life! Jian’s wife denied that she cheated on him, but admitted to having had more than $100,000 of plastic before they got married. (This would make for a great movie!)
Jian divorced and sued his wife, and was awarded $120,000 by a sympathetic Chinese court, after ruling that his spouse had tricked him into marriage under false pretenses.
5. Man sues a cruise for suffering burns to his bare feet
Kurt Gies, a resident of Orlando, sued Carnival Cruise Lines after he allegedly suffered severe burns to his bare feet when he took part in a contest held on the ship’s deck, which was apparently so hot that it burned burned his bare feet. What contest was he a part of , you ask? Hairiest man on the cruise ship.
However, Carnival said that a video of the contest showed that “several guests, including the plaintiff, were barefoot and do not exhibit any signs of distress during the video.”
Too bad he did not have hair on the soles of his feet…then his soles wouldn’t have burned in the first place!
6. Man files lawsuit for ownership of all the planets and space
A Canadian man sued for ownership of the Earth, all other planetary bodies, four of Jupiter’s moons and the space in between, explaining that he wanted to collect planets “like others collect hockey cards.” Talk about ambition! And also – stupidity. He has filed 45 lawsuits since 2001.
Fortunately for the rest of the universe, his case was thrown out and he was banned from filing any future suits without written permission from a judge.
7. California man sues McDonald’s for being given just one napkin
Lawsuit amount: $1.5 million
A California man sued McDonald’s… because he only got ONE NAPKIN with his meal. Webster Lucas claimed that when he went to the counter to ask for more napkins, the manager was rude to him and said that he already got some.
According to his lawsuit, Lucas, who is black, then retorted, “I should have went to eat at the Jack-in-the-Box because I didn’t come here to argue over napkins. I came here to eat.” He claimed the manager was racist towards him and mumbled something about “you people.”
Lucas emailed the general manager saying that the napkin debacle caused him “undue mental anguish”, and that he was insultingly offered free burgers in return.
I don’t mind being insulted and being offered free burgers in return. What is wrong with me?!!!
8. Kidnapper sues hostages for not hiding him from the police
Lawsuit Amount: $235,000
A fugitive murder suspect Jesse Dimmick, ruined a couple’s wedding celebration when he broke into their house after crashing a stolen van onto their lawn. He held them captive as he hid from the authorities. However, the couple were able to escape when Dimmick fell asleep. Shortly after that, the police arrived, and Dimmick was accidentally shot in the back when an officer’s rifle was discharged.
If you think Dimmick’s first mistake was falling asleep while holding someone captive, you must know what he did next. He sued his former hostages for $235,000 and blamed them for his capture saying that they breached a binding, oral contract that said the couple would hide him from the police in return for money.
In his handwritten suit, Dimmick wrote, “As a result of the plaintiffs breech (sic) of contract, I, the defendant suffered a gunshot to my back, which almost killed me. The hospital bills alone are in excess of $160,000, which I have no way to pay.”
*slow claps* What an intelligent man.
9. Man sues beer company because he is not popular with women – unlike what it shows in their ad
Lawsuit Amount: £6,500
In 1991, American Richard Overton sued the makers of Budweiser for false advertising. Why? Because the attractive ladies that were featured in the beer’s TV commercials did not materialize in his own life, unlike the way they did in the ads. He demanded £6,500from brewer Anheuser-Busch for financial loss, mental injury, and emotional distress.
Maybe he should have kept his beer down and worked out instead? That might have done the trick. Just saying.
Commercials are deceptive. Lesson learnt!
10. Man sues himself after drinking alcohol – which is against his religious beliefs
Lawsuit amount: £2.3million
Most people cry when they are disappointed in themself. But Robert Lee Brock, while serving time for robbery, sued HIMSELF for violating his own civil rights. Yes, you read that right. He argued that his religion forbade him from drinking alcohol, and when he “partook of alcoholic beverages”and was later arrested for grand larceny, he “caused myself to violate my religious beliefs”.
He wanted £2.3million but argued that the US government should pay the money as he couldn’t work as he was a “ward of the state” in jail in Virginia.
His lawsuit was dismissed but the judge praised his “innovative approach to civil rights”.
Good Lord man, do you have no self-control at all? Geez.
After reading this, not being able to solve a sum on triple integration doesn’t make you feel so dumb, does it? You are most welcome.
The original version of this post can be found here.