WEB CHUTNEY

Living in Pakistan you come across a lot of different kinds of women. You meet all sorts, some you love and others you just can’t stand.

Here’s a list of 19 girls every Pakistani guy hates:

1. The selfie addict

Can you clam down with your pout and filters lady!

2. The one who puts a deep quote with every picture

Roses are red , violets are blue, no one sucks more than you do!

Why do you post deep quotes with selfies, do they not make sense to you too?

3. The one who bitches about everyone

If she bitches about everyone, be sure she’s bitching about you too.

4. The one who NEVER pays or pitches in for anything

I’m all for gender equality, but if your excuse for not paying is that you’re a girl, that is just unacceptable.

5. The gold digger

She’s always surrounded by Richie Rich guys!

6. The angry one

The one who is angry all the FRIGGING time, that too for no good reason. It’s like she wakes up on the wrong side of the bed EVERYDAY. Jeez! You need to smile, woman. It won’t hurt, I promise.

7. The fake feminist

This woman feels like she isn’t being treated equally and makes a point to make a big fuss about it. She will get angry too if you say something against any woman, even if the woman in question is wrong. Strangely we don’t see you complain when you get privilege over men.

8. The one who keeps asking you for favours

Avoid these girls like the plague. The hard part is realising that they only come to you for a favour. Just remember, if you’re doing something for her all the time, she’s using you.

9. The perpetual damsel in distress

Always the victim, nothing she does or says is her fault. It’s always someone else’s.

10. The bad girl

Now most of it is probably hearsay for sure, and you shouldn’t believe rumors and should make your own decision about a person first hand. But if everyone is singing the same tune about a lady it’s probably for a reason.

11. The Samad Bond

Like Samad bond, this girl is uber chipku (clingy), she’s going to latch on to you and never let go. If you think she is a chipku, RUUUUUUUUNNN!

12. The MUJHE DHEKO

We all know this one. You’ve noticed her, how can you not? She’s the loudest one in the room! She has to be the center of attention at all times. She’s probably also the only girl around because she hates competition.

13. The one who puts on A LOT of makeup

We don’t know what this girl really looks like. Some people admire how one person can wake up really early in the morning and look like a cake right away. But others feel it’s a waste of time. Beauty comes from within not from makeup.

14. The princess

Aww! Daddy’s little girl has quite a bit of nakhras that you will have to bear. You will either end up doing what she wants to do or doing nothing at all.

15. The ‘Ewww”

The burger bachi who prefers going to places like Xanders and Flo. Take her to a dhabha and she’ll be bitching about you to the one who bitches about everyone.

16. The fragile doll

She gets hurt when you breathe near her. Also, she refuses to walk long distances and demands to be dropped outside where ever she’s going. God, she’s annoying!

17. The katao

“Hey, you wanna meet?”

“Yeah, sure!”

“Okay cool, I’ll call you tomorrow!”

And tomorrow never comes… And to put a cherry on top of the cake, she will never ever pick up her phone either.

18. The complainer

This one only has one hobby: complaining.

“Why don’t you meet me?” “I hate that place!” “I hate this movie” “Why don’t you make plans with me any more?”

Even though at that exact moment you are meeting her, she will still complain about how you don’t meet her enough or how everything is just so sad around her. She probably doesn’t have anything else to say.

19. The one who doesn’t want to date you but doesn’t want you to date anyone else either

Yup, saved the worst for last. The girl is your girlfriend without actually being your girlfriend. You’re just an accessory until something better comes along. God, I hate you.

IS there anyone I missed out?